Multitude of Ones
What is Nurture Culture?
Nurturance is the way forward for humankind.
Nurture, the Oxford Dictionary definition of which is 'emotional and physical nourishment and care given to someone' It is also regarded as being a 'womanly quality'.
Nurture Culture basically puts caring at the foundation of the customs and social behaviour of society.
It may be easier to understand the necessity of this kind of culture when we see it in the stark contrast of the culture we were all born into.
Here is a list of some attributes of our culture that prove it to be not Nurturing.
- does not give a voice to its minorities
- exploits (nature, animals, resources, people....)
- does not promote success for non paid works
- hierarchy based on wealth and social privilege
- property control
- violence made to look glamorous
- more money spent on so called "defence" than on education and health
- the Basic Needs of people and the land is sold for profit by those in control
- unhealthy products sold as food etc for profit
- the masses are used for their spending value
We can call this an Exploitative Culture. The above list describes the system that most of the world is subject to. We are being exploited and we are supporting this system so we too are guilty.
Are we talking about the patriarchy?
Many people refer to this as a Patriarchal System. As soon as a woman mentions the patriarchy there is the assumption that the blame will be chucked and responsibility dodged, men lose interest and only the feminists agree, however that is most definitely not what is happening here! First I don't blame, I don't. Its not your fault mister. And second, if only it was that easy, we could hold a referandum, agree to become a Matriarchal System and everything would be fine, but it won't, the systematic change has to happen multilaterally and at a deep and honest level, the switch of gender in power would simply perpetuate the same power dynamic. Its not about you or me, man or woman. We are a team, unity absolute. We are all equally involved and insistent incrimination will not dig us out of this mess. However if we figure out where we went wrong we stand a chance of setting things right.
A major pivot point revolves around the gross imbalance in gender traits upon humankind’s behaviour. Paternalism and the male instinct requires a fine and sensitive tuning, the masculine that resides in both gender needs to reconnect with its mother, with love, healing and nurturing to curtail the aggression and competitiveness that dominates, it should not be repressed but can be channeled better to protect humankind as a whole. The maternal, nurturing way should take centre stage. The way that we raise our children is in direct correlation with the way that we regard the world and each other. When we repress and coerce and use control and fear they become the tools that we use in all our relationships. We lack skills in communication and we lack the essential attributes of transparency, truth and trust. If each human being was given a foundation of excellent parenting and community followed by an education system that bolstered this foundation we can expect much improvement in the overall picture, indeed without this basic reform it is not realistic to expect humankind to prosper.
To clarify; the divide is not clear cut in terms of gender. The nurturance trait is present but painfully repressed in men (and through this repression perversions and depravity can develop). I don't want to dwell on this and what is wrong with the world, we all had enough of bad news, what we need is the good news and the fact is that an opportunity for real progress and healing lies within us and this key point.
For this change to transpire the masculine must acquiesce in the security and knowledge that the feminine is not a threat and does not need oppressive protection, it is the cure and the connector that will heal the wounds
and reconnect us with our planet too. The job in hand is to create a new generation of people who simply do not have the hangs ups that we all have. This shift of essential energy has the potential to take our quest towards a hitherto unimaginable system and manifestation of our species.
How can Nurture Culture become a thing?
When you teach a child a skill, initially they fail and fail again, an impatient parent can cause irrevocable damage, when we help them to try and try again one day they succeed. Humankind is in a similar position right now. Patronizing? I think not, compassion, nurturance and patience are necessary at all levels of society. We are a generation of people who have no basic skills and knowledge, we don’t even know we are being poisoned, robbed and abused simply when we shop, we have no idea how to keep warm if the power goes off, we don’t know who owns the banks we make rich with the interest on our loans, we don’t know why bombs are falling in far off lands and why terrorist are prepared to blow themselves up in our midst, we are basically kids who have no idea how to wipe our own arses in a world that seems to belong to somebody else. Well it doesn’t. The starting point may be teaching a man how to grow a potato in a bucket in his back yard but empowerment and learning is a slow process. If we were to find equality and freedom dumped in our laps we would have no idea what to do with it all (much like the overwhelmed child after too many gifts and cake), it would be a burden. The power shift has to be slow enough to enable a sense of well being and strength in advance of the reality of its responsibility. This is Nurture teaching.
How can I be a teacher? How can I learn?
The ways that Nurturance can be initiated and emphasized on a day to day basis are investigated in posts and on the Action page. However we can all start now. Learning what Nurture means and testing it out will strengthen our understanding of its immense power. Everyone must find their own ways, some ideas:
- walks in nature to reconnect with our world (and ourselves)
- plant something and watch it grow
- learn about mindful and deep listening
- parents taking real care to raise their sons and daughters with nurturance theory at the core
- men attending group therapy with women
- women understanding the basis of masculine behaviour
- ask any person simply what matters to them, listen, don't comment.
- assisting at any local charity for sick, disabled, poor etc (animals or people or land)
- any attempt to have empathy and compassion for any other fellow being or creature we encounter
- making an active choice to not consume one thing that is exploitative and detrimental
(see Manifesto for One page for more ideas)
But who will nurture us?
The answer to that is very clear, we will all nurture each other and ourselves. This isn't some new age self pampering, this is the essential appreciation of the deep reality of ourselves, our vulnerabilities and our immense capabilities.
How will this help anything?
The culture that we live in right now insists that we have to be on top. We are under constant pressure to spend, own, work, thrive and strive and generally be slaves to the system. This system is supposed to exist for us yet we self harm to the degree that our reach of damage extends even to outer space. Nurturance will simply take away the motivating forces, both internal and external that provoke our exploitative and selfish behaviour, we will be free of the pressure that stokes the fuel of this behaviour. The ability to see us and our planet as a whole that we can love and cherish without shame or greed will be the biggest liberation we can hope for, within this huge psychological shift lies the key to extreme social and political change.